Twisted Tomato is an urbane Italian restaurant in downtown Kelowna, one with a pretty, breezy rooftop patio if you happen to be there at the right time of year. On our dirty punk tour, sleeping on floors and binge drinking for days on end, this was our one fine dining indulgence, the sort of thing that the very foodie Kleins96 would do. Better than strippers or blow, right?
My brother Dylan is a vegetarian who still eats fish and seafood, so we started with a duo of nachos, one set crab for him, the other duck confit. Both were amazing, but the duck was truly the star. The chips themselves I believe were fried wontons, and the chef wisely distributed heaping portions of the ultra-savoury toppings onto only a few chips, which is how all nachos should be in my opinion.
(An aside: there’s nothing worse than a giant mountain of burnt, cheese-less tortilla chips posing as nachos, the kind you find at chain restaurants and sports bars that try to wow you with portion sizes. There’s like six good bites and the rest gets thrown in the garbage. I’ll order a fart souffle before I order nachos from a restaurant with Uncle Moe’s shit all over the walls.)
Andrew ordered a pizza of prosciutto, cambozola and pears, which would have been much better had he ordered it thin crust, instead of the big doughy one that the big doughy dude chose instead. Both he and Dylan said they preferred a big thick crust, which I’m chalking up to lifetimes spent on the prairies, being weaned on Western, Houston and 2-4-1 pizzas. Still weird though.
For the main course, I indulged in one of several gourmet mac ‘n’ cheese options, mine with bacon and several mixed cheeses. Dylan had the lobster mac and it was unreal. Both were very delicious, though heavy like a barrel of sandbags on a hot July day. Our serious food coma required a small dip in the frigid Okanagan to recover our senses and make us alert enough to, well, get drunk all night. Yup, it’s a tough life.